this is our last good night

it was about time we reached 100.
did we ever think we'd end up like this a year ago
once lovers now haters
once bests now enemies
theres nothing more we can say
we turned all the cards on our table
used all the lines up on this page
finished the chapter
and this time we cant even blame the wine
i wish it could all change
but theres only so many times we can keep this up.
dial 155 baby
she'll answer

dance like no-ones watching

we press on
we learn and we grow
although pherhaps we dont see it
infact we know we dont
i think today i opened a new chapter in the story of my life
a job interview
i guess its time i changed the page
but its hard too
much harder than you'll ever know.
ive discovered that from ever relationship you have
you take something away from it with you
sometimes its good
sometimes its bad
for example
ive learnt that when someone tells you they will be there for you
there lieing to you
there are only two people in your whole life who will be there for you
no matter what
your mum and your best friend
these two people will never judge you
or question you
but will always, no matter what
be there for you.
lets see what tonight brings.
next aim in life
to attend angels and kings bar in nyc.x

what are we getting into?

on days like these
i often have a million things to write
but i just cant put them into words.
as usual.
as usual its the same drill.
drive alone
cry a bit
come home
blog
sad playlist
i miss my ex boyfriends
and the times we shared
the good times
i miss my american friends
and they texts and calls making my day
i miss innocence
and happyness
and true love.
i miss everything that hurts the most
i always want what i cant have
and it seems nowadays all i do is pull my famous fake smile
that only one person can see through.
but shes got her own hassles and worries at the moment.
and to be honest.
im proper worried about her.
she needs to get it all off her chest.
we need this trip down south more than anything
its gona be so awesome
abuse the camera please?
did my prom dress look good?

Always Allways.

so i havnt been around for a while
for a number of reasons
one being i couldnt be arsed with the internet
another being i dont want to remember the past week or so
and ive been busy with real life.
but that doesnt mean i havnt been writing
ive been writing in my head
which makes me think a lot
i went for the best drive the other night
i should have been scared
but i wasnt
i went upto rivi
drove across the top
like where my dad used to take me
and then to my fav fav fav place ever
to watch all the lights and the world pass me by
it was so peaceful and beautiful
it really puts things into perspective for me.
ive spent a lot of time thinking lately
where did it all go wrong
the infidelity
the lies
the heartache
and the pain
because since then it hasnt seemed to get much better for me
maybe until now
i wont rant and rave
it doesnt feel that way
it feels different from ever before
its funny how opposites attract
and maybe this is where ive been going wrong all these times
maybe i need this boy
whos daft enough to call up and ask if id like some chocolate
someone whos texts me to tell me he misses me
and he really really likes me
maybe
just maybe
i need someone whos different to me
someone who doesnt know who fall out boy are, but understands my pete obessions.
someone who doesnt bum the internet, or even knows how to use it.
someone who couldnt really give two shits about what nme think, or anyone else for that matter.
someone who thinks that hellogoodbye song is pretty good, but wonders why there called hellogoodbye.
someone who will listen to me, and tell me the truth no matter what.
someone who will teach me how to cook, or try.
someone who tells me im beautiful everyday, even in the morning.
someone who brings a smile to my face, and a laugh to my lips.
someone whos great with kids, and would be an amazing dad.
someone whos going somewhere, and wants to take me with him.
someone who wants to be loved, and fall in love.
someone who really cant spell, or is good with words.
someone no-one would think is romantic, but really is.
someone who i wouldnt have thought i would be with in a million years, but somehow ended up with him.
its my time to be happy.
its my time to shine.x

in these extremes
we take a bow
and take a pill
it never looked so attractive